Mother Knows Best
by MKAmericanhero
Summary: Now maybe I'm the only person who thought this, but when Emily originally came out to her parents she told the girls and everyone rallied around her. Then in the next episode Aria's mom was talking to Pam about Emily being gay like she was already fully aware of it. My thoughts then went to how each of the girls told their parents and this was born.
1. Ella

**Now maybe I'm the only person who thought this, but when Emily originally came out to her parents she told the girls and everyone rallied around her. Then in the next episode Aria's mom was talking to Pam about Emily being gay like she was already fully aware that she was gay. My thoughts then went to how each of the girls told their parents (namely their mothers, because they are the only ones we seem to see very much of) that one of their closest friends had come out of the closet. This will literally be a three chapter story and I'm getting ahead of myself because I have several stories going and grad school just started for me, but I can't put this off any longer.**

When Aria walked through the door she threw her bag onto the couch and yelled out to see who was home. "Mike? Mom? Anyone home?"

"In the kitchen honey." Aria rounded the corner to see her mother putting something in the oven. "Smells good."

"Thanks, it's just you and me for dinner tonight so I figured I might try something a little different. How's Hanna doing?"

Aria picked a few olives out of the salad that was already on the counter and popped them in her mouth before answering her mother. "Better, her leg is healing as best it can and I think she just wants to go home to her designer bed sheets." Aria laughed for the first time in days at her own joke. Ella smiled, "well nobody likes hospitals and I'm sure she'll feel much safer in her own home, this kind of thing can just make people really uneasy." Aria nodded silently and Ella continued, "how about Spencer and Emily? How are they doing?" Just as she asked the question Aria's phone started to ring and she was relieved to see that it was Emily calling. She held up a finger to her mother to excuse herself for a second and picks up the phone while picking through the other salad mixings. "Hey Em, what's up?"

"You need to rescue me, please." Emily didn't sound like she was in danger, just kind of upset so Aria tried not to overreact. "Rescue you from what Em, what's going on?"

"My parents have not stopped fighting since I walked back in the door and when the take a break then my mother is breathing down my neck about dating one of her friend's sons… sons Aria."

"Damn it, Em I'm so sorry they aren't handling it like you hoped." Ella perked up and was now full on eavesdropping on her daughter's conversation. "What do you need from me?"

"Tell me that I can crash at your house tonight, I can't handle this anymore Aria. I mean I knew they were going to be upset, but I hate hearing them fight like this and knowing that I am the reason why. I just really need some peace and I'm not going to get it here, not with this happening." Aria could hear Emily getting more upset and it sounded like she was crying a little bit, or trying really hard not to cry. "Em, it's going to be ok, don't cry." Ella was already concerned, but knowing that something had Emily upset to the point of tears made it worse.

"Why don't I have Spencer come over too that way you can tell your mom that it's a group sleep over?"

"That sounds good, I'll be over in 20 alright?"

"Ok see you then, and Em…I know it may not mean much coming from me, but we love you regardless and this doesn't change anything to us. Alright, you are still the same Emily to us and eventually your mom will see that too. It's going to get better over time I promise you."

"I'm not going to hold my breath…but thanks. See you in 20." The line went dead and Aria put her phone on the counter and sighed heavily before looking at her mom who was already starring at her daughter as though she was waiting for an explanation.

"Is it ok if Emily and Spencer stay here tonight?"

"Of course, but first you're going to tell me what has Emily so upset that she is crying over the phone to you wanting to escape from Pam."

"I can't tell you." Aria was sure that it wasn't her place to out Emily to anyone let alone her mom who was Emily's teacher.

"Why not?"

"Not mine to tell. If Em wants to reach out to you then fine, but I can't do that to her, not after the week she's had." Ella shut the oven off and sat on the same side of the counter as Aria and made her daughter look at her. "Aria, if she is staying in my house I get to know why she is so interested in getting out of her own and why she was crying."

"I can't break her trust; you don't get it I really cannot tell you."

"Aria, be straight with me, is Emily alright?"

"I mean physically she's fine, she's just upset and her mom is making it worse."

"Making what worse how?"

Aria knew that they could be at this all day so she bit the bullet, "you have to swear not to tell Emily I told you, let her tell you when she feels safe to do it."

"Aria I can't promise anything until you tell me what has her so upset." Aria mumbled something under her breath and Ella couldn't hear it.

"Aria." Her mother had that warning tone that told her to stop beating around the bush and spit it out so she did.

"She came out to her parents." Ella was a little surprised, "she what?"

"Came out to her parents, you know like out of the closest…as a lesbian…she's gay."

"Yes Aria I know what being a lesbian means, I just never thought Emily was one."

"Well she is and Mama Fields is not happy."

"What about her dad?"

"He's trying to understand and be supportive so he's trying to calm her mom down so that she will listen to reason, but it just ends up with them fighting and Em can't take it anymore."

"No wonder she wants to get out and come here."

"Exactly, so when she gets here just don't bring it up unless she does." Aria heard the front door open and knew it was Emily because she could hear the girl yelling on her phone.

"No, mom, mom, mother. Listen to me for one second, I'm standing in her kitchen right now look at her and her mom, it is just a slumber party. We want to be close together while Hanna is still away, you can't fault me for that." Aria could hear Pam say something on the other line. "No mom, we are going to watch movies and sleep, I'm not going to sneak away to meet anybody. You know what hold on." Emily held the phone out to Ella and for the first time Ella looked at the girl and realized she had been crying and she looked tired.

"Can you tell my mother that I am here and I'm not going to sneak out." Ella grabbed the phone and assured Pam the girls would not be leaving the house and then Emily took the phone back. "See everything is fine. No mom I can't just see your point of view because I try not to be homophobic. Stop it, I can't have this conversation with you again today. Because if I hear one more time that this isn't how things are supposed to be I will be perfectly happy looking at schools out of state and away from you. Your move mom, either find a way to deal with this like an adult or you can watch me as I leave." Emily hung up the phone and threw it into the other room and it landed on a chair. She looked back at Ella and still in a very upset tone said, "I'm gay, my mother hates me, my dad is trying to reign her in and I don't know if I want to throw up or eat a lot of pizza and chocolate." Ella hugged Emily and tried to get her to breath normally.

"It's going to be alright Emily."

"How do you know?"

"I'm magic clearly. Come on, you and I can go order that pizza for you guys to share alright." Emily nodded and for the first time that day she felt like she could breathe and relax and just be herself, whatever that meant.

**Next up Ashley**


	2. Ashley

**Thanks for the feedback everyone. Glad to see that I wasn't the only person who thought about how the parents found out about Emily. I'm trying to make it true to the character of each mother, but forgive me if I miss the mark slightly. Anyway, here is Ashley Marin as promised. Also I'm glad at least one person caught the Charmed reference in the last chapter. Anyway, enjoy folks.**

Hanna was flipping through another fashion magazine when her hospital door swung open and Emily poked her head around the corner.

"You up for another visitor?"

"That depends do you come bearing gifts." Emily rolled her eyes and pulled the newest Vogue out of her bag. Hanna clapped her hands like an over excited child, "yes, you rock and may take a seat." Emily plopped down in the chair next to the window and rested her feet on the end of Hanna's bed. "So where's your mom?"

"Went to go grab a newspaper or a book, something boring and informative. Enough about my life, what's up with you how's it going at home?"

"Let me phrase this properly, I imagine that there was less tension in the room when Henry the 8th split from the Catholic Church than there was in my house when my dad confirmed my mother's fears about me being gay."

"Wait…what. Is this like current events or something?"

"Hanna, stop sleeping through history class."

"Not my fault it's boring, but anyway I'm sorry your mom is taking it so hard." At that moment Ashley Marin walked back in and was only half paying attention to what she was doing as she dug through her purse. "Hanna they didn't have Vogue, but I brought you another magazine." When she looked up she saw Hanna with the magazine and sighed into a laugh. "Who needs a caring mother when you have best friends that will bring you fashion magazines? Thank you Emily. So what are you two talking about?"

"Nothing interesting." Emily answered quickly, but Hanna blurted out, "Emily says there is trouble in paradise at Casa de Fields."

"Hanna." Emily spat at her friend through her teeth, "do you even know the meaning of the word discretion."

"I know that it was a word on our SAT's. What it's not like we haven't all dealt with mommy issues in our lives, your mommy issues just happen to be more complicated."

"Oh my God, Han I will pay you to stop talking."

"What, it's my mother not a member of the press."

"Still, not everyone needs to know that my mother is being difficult." Ashley watched in silence as the two girls went back and forth and she finally jumped in.

"Ladies, back to your corners and everyone calm down. Emily is everything alright at home?"

"It's fine." The teenager answered a little too quickly and Ashley knew something was going on underneath the swimmer's quiet demeanor.

"Come on Em, just tell her that you and your mom having been butting heads over you being…"

"Hanna, god damn it, I don't want to talk about it anymore ok. I have done nothing but talk and fight about it for days and I'm too tired to defend my life to anyone else, I just want ten minutes of not talking about it." Emily stormed out of the room and Ashley looked to Hanna for an explanation and she got a blank stare.

"You knew better than to push her like that Hanna, but what is she so mad about?"

"Her mom's just been giving her a hard time lately."

"You aren't going to tell me why she's upset are you?"

"I value my life too much to break the best friend code of secrecy."

"You were about to break it ten seconds ago."

"That was before I found out that Em would break me in half for doing it."

"Hanna."

"Mom, look she didn't go far cuz her bag and her keys are still here, she'll calm down and be back." Ashley picked up Emily's bag and when she did a book fell out of it and when she picked it up off the floor to put it back inside she had a pretty good idea about what had Emily so upset and had her and Pam up in arms. She told Hanna that she would be back and she left the room holding Emily's purse and keys. She stopped at the elevator and paused to think about where a teenager would go in a hospital in an effort to get some space. She tried every place she could think of and when she ran out of options she found herself staring at a map of the hospital trying to plot her next move and when she turned down another hallway she crossed in front of the hospital's chapel. She was three steps past the doorway that led to the chapel before something made her turn around. Sitting in the first pew of the small chapel was Emily, at least from what she could tell it was Emily. Ashley walked in and quietly walked up to the front of the Church and stood by the pew.

"This seat taken?" Emily jumped a little when she heard the familiar voice, but then resumed looking at the floor. Ashley took her silence as an invitation to sit down so she settled in next to Emily, careful to give her some space.

"You left in such a hurry you left your keys and bag. Thought you might need them so I came looking for you." She handed Emily the items and Emily mumbled thank you. "When I picked your purse up this fell out of it, thought you might like it back seeing as t you are almost done reading it." Ashley handed her the book and Emily's face turned a funny mix of stark white and beet red. The silence settled back over them and so Ashley kept talking.

"Not many teenagers read 'Always My Child' unless they are hoping to give it to their parents at some point." Emily turned the book over in her hands a few times, but said nothing. Ashley didn't think it would be this hard to get Emily to just say it, but she was hurting and was fast shutting down.

"You don't have to say anything to me Emily; we can sit here in silence all day if that is what you need to do to make you feel better. But if there is something you want to tell me, something you need some help with, I can be a pretty good listener." She looked at Emily whose head was dropping lower and lower and it hurt Ashley to see a sweet kid like Emily suffering so much over something like who she was. Ashley reached over and grabbed her hand, "would it help if I told you that I will love you regardless of what you have to say to me?"

Emily looked up at her best friend's mother and was lost as to how a woman who wasn't her own mother could love her so unconditionally. Emily tried to say something, but nothing came out of her mouth but the weird noise you make after you have been crying too hard for a long time. She closed her mouth and let Ashley Marin wrap her arms around her shoulders and hug her as she lost control over her tears. When her breathing had evened out she shifted so that her head was resting on Ashley's shoulder.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"Tell me what?" Ashley wasn't going to let Emily get out of this conversation unless she actually said it out loud.

"I like…I'm a…I'm gay." Ashley smiled and kissed the top of Emily's head, "see not that hard to tell me after all. And you never have to apologize to me for not telling me sooner, you did it in your own time."

"Why aren't you mad?"

"Why on earth would I be mad about you being gay?"

"My mother is acting like I killed someone." Emily sighed heavily, "I'm pretty sure she hates me."

"Emily, no parent ever truly hates their child and your mom may be set in her ways, but the last thing she would do is hate you."

"If my dad hadn't been home I'm pretty sure she would have kicked me out."

"I highly doubt she would have done that."

"She said I needed to be fixed, that she and my dad needed to fix this, does that sound supportive to you." Ashley winced and eternally cursed Pam for jumping to every extreme before thinking through her words. "That must have hurt. What did your dad say to that?"

"That after all the things he saw in the war that me being alive and healthy was the only thing that really mattered. He stuck up for me even though he doesn't understand it. At least he's trying."

"Sounds like he's trying hard to accept and understand this new part of your life so he can love you through all the hard parts of it. Honey give your mom some time, she'll realize sooner or later that you are the same baby she's loved since she heard you cry the day you were born."

"You think so?"

"I would never lie to you about something like this. And just so you know, you are always welcome in our home if your house is too much to handle."

"That means a lot, thank you. Sorry about crying on your jacket."

"Never apologize for crying, it's healthy and after what you all have dealt with recently, you have every right to cry." Ashley stood up and Emily followed suit and as they walked into the elevators that led back upstairs Emily turned back to Ashley.

"Aren't you shocked?"

"About what?"

"That I'm gay." Ashley laughed a little and Emily finally smiled, "what is so funny?"

"Honey it may be a stereotype so please forgive me, but you wear more plaid than a lumberjack and every time I saw you kiss a boy you looked like you were being tortured." Ashley stepped off the elevator first and when Emily followed her she finished, "also you talk in your sleep sometimes and three months ago during a slumber party you were talking to someone in your dream who apparently tasted like strawberries. Call me a psychic, but the last person I kissed who tasted like strawberries was a girl I met at a kegger in college." Emily smiled and followed Ashley back down the hallway to Hanna's room.

**I always saw a deeper bond between Ashley and Emily so I wanted to make this one more intense, hopefully you all liked it. Always my Child is a book for parents of gay teens and one I read hoping to help my parents help me. Off to bed with me because I have a dentist appointment in the morning but thanks for reading everyone, hope to hear from you all in reviews.**


	3. Veronica

**So sorry for the wait but midterms hit me hard and I was super busy, also Veronica was harder to write than I thought she'd be so I took a shot in the dark. I see her as someone who on some level cares, but is somewhat cold or distant, but that is super hard to write so I tried softening her up a bit for this chapter. Hope you guys like this installment.**

Veronica Hastings pulled into her driveway at ten that night and to say she was tired was an understatement. She had finally finished going over briefs and last minute case notes and was beyond happy to be home, if for no other reason, now she could get some sleep. Her husband was out of town on business and Melissa was off doing something which meant it was just her and Spencer. She had expected to walk into a quiet house and she did, but Spencer wasn't asleep in her room. When Veronica walked into through the kitchen Spencer was sitting at the bar with her computer in front of her and some papers and books scattered about. After shutting the door quietly behind her Veronica looked at the items Spencer had around her expecting to see college guides or SAT books, but instead she found something that confused her.

The website that Spencer had fallen asleep searching was for PFLAG and the papers scattered around her were from the organization and ones like it. Veronica was understandably confused; she had spent the last few years breaking up fights between Melissa and Spencer when they would get into it over boys they both found to be attractive. Then Veronica thought about it and reminded herself that PFLAG was set up to support gay people, but also to be a source of support to their families and friends so she assumed Spencer was just trying to be a supportive friend. In an effort to make Spencer wake up without scaring her, Veronica went over and opened the door and this time she closed it hard enough for it to make a sound. Spencer's head shot up and she tried to organize the papers in front of her as her mother reentered the kitchen.

"Up late studying?"

"Not really, just doing some research." Veronica picked up one of the stray papers and held it up, "something you want to tell me Spence?"

"What? No, this isn't for me mom, I mean it is but not because I like…I'm not gay. Not that there is anything wrong with it. It's for a friend; I'm just trying to help a friend." Veronica had to laugh a little at her daughter's rambling. She handed Spencer the paper before continuing. "So what friend are you trying to help?"

"Just a friend."

"Spencer, there are only a few people you are close with that you would be going to all this trouble for and I think I know all their names so come on just tell me."

"Are you saying that I don't have that many friends?" Spencer pretended to be hurt, because she knew that wasn't what her mother was trying to say.

"All I am saying is that since Alison died the four of you girls have been inseparable, so I think it's safe of me to assume that it's one of them you are trying to help." Spencer continued to clean up her stuff in silence, refusing to out Emily to her mother, not that she thought that she would care, but it wasn't her secret to tell. Spencer was about to walk upstairs when her mother interrupted her one more time, "its Emily isn't it?"

Spencer stopped suddenly and turned to her mother shocked that she had guessed accurately. "How could you have possibly guessed that it was Emily that I'm trying to help?"

"Hanna has been boy crazy since she hit puberty, Aria always gets a dreamy look in her eye when you all go on about boys and that leaves Emily who was dating a boy until a new girl moved in next door to her family. Give me a little credit Spencer; I am a lawyer after all, I see things that a lot of other people don't."

"Seems like the only people surprised at her being a lesbian are her own parents."

"She told her parents? How'd that go?"

"Not great. I mean they didn't kick her out or anything but her mom is being really hostile about it."

"It's not something any parent is ready to hear Spencer, Pam will work out her own issues and then maybe they can move on from this difficult time."

"Her dad doesn't need more time and he's in the military. Em said he was surprised but he stood up for her when her mom started saying things that were hurtful. I get being surprised, but that shouldn't be an excuse for treating your child like there is something wrong with them, right?"

"I can't answer that Spencer."

"Would you ever do that to me?"

"What?"

"What if the tables were turned I was the gay one, would you treat me like that, like I was defective or broken, something that needed to be fixed? Would you do that to me?" Veronica had never seen Spencer this upset over anything before and she was surprised when her daughter started yelling and crying, demanding an answer.

"Of course I wouldn't do that to you."

"Well then maybe you can tell me why Mrs. Fields thinks it's an appropriate way to treat Emily?"

"Spencer I don't know why her mother is acting like that, if you are really that upset I can try talking to Pam about it."

"After everything we've been through; all the death and all the hushed whispers we get when we walk around town, the one place she shouldn't have to be brave is her own house." Spencer was getting more and angrier and worked up and Veronica didn't know what to do to make her calm down. Spencer sat down on the couch with a defeated huff and held up the research she had printed out. "I've read everything those sites had and I can't imagine not loving someone just because they're gay." Veronica sat down next to a very upset Spencer and patted her daughter's knee trying to soothe her.

"Emily is very lucky to have you Spencer, clearly you are trying to support her and help her through this hard time with her parents. I'm just curious, why are you getting this worked up about it?"

"Because hating Emily is like hating a puppy, I just don't get how her mother could be that cold to her own child. I mean she's gay, it's not like she did anything wrong."

"Spencer it's much easier for you and the girls to support Emily because she is your best friend, but when you have children you build up this ideal life for them and when they do things that go against that some parents react poorly."

"I'm never doing that to my kids."

"Spencer, spending all your time and energy hating her mother's reaction is going to help anything, why not just put all that passion into supporting Emily. This is sadly something that she and Pam have to fight out for themselves, but you can support her and let her know that no matter what you love you as she is."

"You don't care that she's a lesbian do you?"

"If you mean am I angry or otherwise upset by it, then of course my answer is no, I don't care that she's gay Spencer. I'm a little surprised, but I'm certainly not upset by it. I just wish she had been able to come out sooner, that must have been hard on her."

"Yeah well that sleazy Detective dragged her out of the closet and so she had to tell us."

"Wait, when did that happen?"

"That day you found us in the library at school, that's why Emily was crying. He had found a letter she had written to Ali that basically said that she was mad because Ali didn't love her the way Emily loved Ali. She had to tell us at that point."

"Spencer she could sue him for that and easily win a lot of money and his badge on top of it."

"No, she doesn't want that, she'd die if I told you that part. It's just deep down she didn't even want to tell us."

"Spencer I don't think she did that to hurt you girls, it's a scary thing to come to terms with and saying it out loud to your closest friends makes it real. You can't un-ring the bell sweetie."

"I wish this wasn't so hard for her."

"I know Spence, me too, but she has you and the girls so she already has a lot more than most other people in her position. She knows that if nothing else she is loved by those closest to her and give Pam a little time Spencer. Eventually, she'll realize she loves her daughter a lot more than the dreams she has to change."

"I'm not going to hold my breath, but ok. I'm going to go to bed, I told Emily I'd pick her up in the morning to go visit Hanna. Night mom." Spencer gave her mother a quick hug before heading upstairs and Veronica went to follow her. Before Spencer closed her bedroom door, she called after her mother, "hey mom, thank you."

Veronica smiled, "you're welcome honey, sleep well." And with that both women shut the doors to their bedrooms and for the time being the matter had been laid to rest.

**So, so, so sorry for the wait guys, but I hope you enjoyed this part. I gave Veronica a soul because I didn't want to write her as being super bitchy like she is on the show. I am thinking of doing one more chapter where all the moms have a little chit chat about this new piece of information that they now have about Emily. Let me know it you want something like that or if I should just end it here. Thanks.**


	4. Meeting of the Minds

**So people in general said that they wanted to see a chapter with all the mothers talking about what they now know about Emily and perhaps how they should approach Pam. In my mind this takes place after the visit of Paige's dad in The New Normal, but before Pam is made aware of what happened. In my head this was the conversation that influenced Ella to say something to Pam at school that day.**

That weekend the girls made plans to hang out at Hanna's house and just try to enjoy one weekend without terrible things plaguing their lives. Emily was still upset over Paige's dad coming to school, but she couldn't exactly tell her mother what had happened, because well she knew the response she would get. She did her best to put it behind her and at her request the girls stopped talking about it and tried to focus on something else. Saturday morning found Emily, Aria and Hanna in Hanna's kitchen trying to bake a pie, something none of them knew how to do, but they figured it would be a fun way to spend the day. They were waiting for the Spencer to show up and soon the doorbell rang and Hanna opened the door to find Spencer standing in the doorway with her mom.

"Sorry I'm late; my mom needs my car today so she offered to give me ride."

"'No problem we haven't started yet. Mrs. Hastings my mom and Aria's mom are outside on the patio if you want to join them." She stepped aside so that both women could step inside the house.

"I have some time before I need to be at the office, I'd love to join them." Hanna and Spencer rejoined Emily and Aria in the kitchen and Veronica found her way outside to where Ella and Ashley were sitting at the patio table talking about something that seemed serious.

"I hope I'm not interrupting anything, Hanna told me you two were out here." Ashley stood up and added another chair to the table. "You're not interrupting, take a seat. Ella was just filling me in on the latest drama to come out of Rosewood High."

"What happened this time? I thought things had kind of evened out for the girls and I would have thought that if anything else had happened that Spencer would have told me something." Ella took a swig of her coffee before answering, "well, she probably didn't say anything to you because this drama had nothing to do with her, at least not directly."

"Then who does it involve?"

"Nick McCullers."

"Well Nick certainly likes the sound of his own voice, he was always the most insufferable parent to deal with when Spencer played field hockey. What has he done this time?"

"He showed up at school and started preaching the word according to Nick McCullers all over the cafeteria in the middle of lunch period. Yelling about how he thinks his daughter is being robbed of opportunities to be front and center on her team. Apparently he thinks one of her team mates is getting special treatment."

"I'm still lost, how does this have anything to do with the girls?"

"Paige McCullers is on the swim team." All of a sudden Veronica realized how this came back to their children, to Emily in particular. Ella told them what was said in detail and both Ashley and Veronica were shocked and angered that this had happened.

"So he actually thinks that Emily being a lesbian is giving her a leg up in the competition? Is he delusional or just stupid?" Ashley was truly stunned.

"Probably a bit of both. He thinks that the school is giving her special treatment to make it clear that they support gay people. All because he kid didn't make Captain."

"Has Emily said anything?" Veronica asked looking in the kitchen where the girls were making a mess, but appeared to be having fun.

Ashley shook her head, "Hanna called me at work on Friday afternoon and asked if Emily could stay here over the weekend, no explanation just asked if she could. I just figured that she and Pam needed some more space so of course I said it was fine. I came home from work, both of them were dead silent at dinner and something seemed off, but when I asked what was wrong Emily shot Hanna a deadly serious look and she muttered something about how it was nothing important. She seems ok today, but she could be putting on a brave face."

"Do you think Pam knows?" Veronica asked the question they had all been thinking.

Ella shrugged her shoulders, "I don't see any way she could. Emily stayed here Friday night and as far as we know Emily hasn't said anything about it to her, but my guess is that it's still kind of a standoff in their house and with Wayne gone, no one is there to play peacemaker."

"Shouldn't one of us tell her? I mean he over stepped a huge line, he attacked her verbally on school grounds, if she was my kid I'd be breathing down his neck with a lawsuit so big it would take him until next year to fully understand it." Ella nodded in agreement with Veronica.

"I agree, but who gets the privilege of being the one to tell Pam."

"Not to throw you under that bus Ella, but it should probably be you. I mean we all love Emily, but you were there when it happened, you know what he said first hand." Ashley offered her friend a small smile and Ella nodded.

"Your right, I should have called her the day it happened, but I should still be the one to tell her. Parent-teacher conferences are Monday, maybe I can talk to her then. How do I even start that conversation, 'hey Pam, sorry you can't deal with you daughter being a lesbian but a parent came to school and started yelling hate speech around the cafeteria and by the way your child was sitting right there'?"

"I wouldn't open with that." All the women looked up to see Emily leaning against the patio door frame. Ella's face went red and she tried to recover, "Emily, we were just talking…"

"About me, I heard. I didn't mean to eavesdrop, I just came out here to ask where you keep the sugar." Emily cracked a smile that seemed a little forced. "It's ok Mrs. Montgomery, I mean you're a teacher and you were there that day, but it's really no big deal."

"Emily, it's a huge deal. Mr. McCullers had no right to do and say what he did." Veronica interjected.

"Well, it's over and telling my mom isn't going to solve anything."

"Emily, she's your mom, she loves you."

"My mother loves who I used to be, she loves a lie, she doesn't love me as I am. Don't you think there's a reason that I haven't told her what happened? I know what she thinks about me, I know what she'll say. She isn't going to come to my rescue, she's going to tell me that this is what my life is going to be like, that I might as well get used to it now if this is the choice I've made for my own life. Telling her won't make it hurt any less." All three older women sat in a stunned silence before Ashley finally tried to say something helpful.

"Emily, your mom may not understand things right now, but I hardly think she is going to let an adult man push her daughter around and then say that you deserved it. And for the record you didn't deserve or ask for any of this to happen, ok, this isn't your fault."

"Isn't it, I mean if I wasn't gay, if I hadn't come out to anyone then he never would have done what he did? My mother is just going to tell me that this is life I chose and that it's only going to get worse. Think about it, one man throwing ignorant epithets at me isn't going to compare to the lifetime of homophobic slurs I have waiting for me in the real world. I might as well get used to it now, dig my heels into the ground, grow and thick skin and wait for the next punch." Emily had tears streaming down both cheeks and inside the girls did her the solid favor of pretending that they couldn't hear what she was saying.

All three mothers were completely unsure of what to say next. They didn't want to make empty promises to Emily, but they had to give the girl something. "Emily, being out, being gay doesn't give people the right to treat you like you're less than human. You should never get used to that, you always have to fight against that." Ella tried to reason with her.

"Well maybe I don't want to fight anymore, maybe I don't want to be the brave one anymore, maybe I want to give up and take the easy way of life and just let them call me what they want. Let them say that what I feel in my heart for Maya is wrong, let them say that any marriage I have is a crime against nature, let them say that I'm going to hell. My own mother is standing against me, how can you expect me to believe that the rest of the world will see me as anything other the dyke on the swim team." In one fluid motion Ashley was on her feet and had her hands on either side of Emily's shoulders.

"Hey, you listen to me and you listen to me real good. I know you're upset and scared and angry. Hell, I am upset and scared and angry, but you will not refer to yourself using that word in my house ever again. Do you understand me?" Emily mumbled something through her tears, but Ashley would not let up, "Emily look at me and tell me you understand." Emily managed to lock eyes with Ashley, but she still said nothing.

"Emily, take a breath and look at me." The teenager took a shaky breath and looked Ashley in the eye once more. "Good, now tell me, when I found you in the hospital chapel, what did I tell you?"

"That you'd love me no matter what." Ashley smiled a sad smile and tried to brush some of the tears away from Emily's eyes. "That's right. I meant it then and I mean it now Emily, I love you and I'm not going to let some self-righteous father push you around. You don't have to deal with this by yourself ok, this is the part where you let adults stand up for you and help you."

Emily shook her head and forced a laugh, "you know what's really sick about all this? When it happened, after he left the school I didn't have the instinct to run home or turn to my mother."

Ashley bit the bullet and asked, "Where did you want to run to?" Emily choked back a few sobs and finally managed to say in a hushed whisper, "here." That last word took all the strength that Emily had and after she said it she promptly lost control of her tears and without fighting it she let Ashley wrap her arms around her. Ashley let the distraught teenager cry into her shirt and she tried to soothe her best she could.

"It's ok Emily, you're here now ok? I got you." As she rubbed Emily's back and tried to calm her down she shot Ella a look that communicated more than words ever could. Ella knew that she had to convince Pam that this was important and demanded her attention.

**Sorry that got a little intense, but when I started getting into it that was what felt right. Honestly, if someone had done that to me I would have lost it and we never got to see Emily deal with it other than being really mature about it. Anyway, thanks to everyone who read and reviewed, favorite etc. I'm done with this story, but thankfully tomorrow the Halloween episode comes on and we get to see Paige as Marlene Dietrich (well I'm excited). Anyway thanks for your loyalty and thanks for reading, now I'm off to watch the Giants play the Cardinals and hopefully get back into the World Series. **


	5. Should I Continue This Series?

So the last batch of these stories did well and everyone seemed to enjoy them so I thought about maybe doing a continuing of the mother knows best series. Show how the moms deal and help with everything surrounding Maya's death and the rest of Emily's life. If people think this is good idea or something they might like to see please let me know.


	6. This Can't Be Happening Again

**Ok so a lot of people voted for this story to be continued so I am going to and I think I'll just add onto this story since you all are already following it. I'm going to start this next part with the night that they find Maya's body and that will take a few chapter at least so enjoy and let me know if there is anything you all like or want to see. Thanks again for everyone's support.**

Ashley Marin wasn't expecting to have an exciting evening: Hanna was at the dance with the girls and she figured that they would end up having a slumber party at someone's house. She was half asleep on the couch when her cell phone alerted her to Hanna calling her so she quickly answered it9.

"I thought you had forgotten all about me. Where are you guys?"

"Emily's house." Hanna sounded tired and Ashley could tell something was wrong immediately.

"Hanna, what's wrong? You sound like you're crying." Ashley sat up and threw the blanket off her lap. She searched for her shoes and jacket as she waited for Hanna to answer.

"Can you come meet us here?"

"I'm on my way, but you need to tell me what's wrong." Ashley was running out the door with slippers on and was trying to getting her arms into her jacket and still talk to Hanna. "Are you ok? Are you hurt?"

"Yes, no…we are all physically fine."

"Hanna what happened?" Ashley was desperate as she started up her car.

"Please don't make me say it over the phone. I'll tell you when you get here."

"I'll be there in five minutes." She wasn't positive, but Ashley was pretty sure she broke all kinds of traffic laws getting to the Fields house. She saw the police cars surrounding the cal de sac and her mind went to the worst case scenario. She threw her car into park and rushed toward the house only to be stopped by a police officer. Before she could even explain that she belonged there and that her daughter was inside she heard Toby yell over to let her through. The officer let Ashley under the tape and she met Toby who was standing on the porch.

"What the hell happened? Why are all the cops here?"

"Mrs. Fields heard a noise outside about an hour or so ago. She came outside to check it out and she found a body on the lawn around the side of the house." He pointed at the coroner van that was pulling away as they stood there.

"Are the girls alright?"

"They're shaken up and upset. They're trying to hold it together for Emily." Toby leaned against the banister and took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down and not start crying as well.

"Wait, what about Emily?" Toby looked like someone had just hit him in the gut. He took a deep breath and in an almost reverent voice he responded. "They can't say for sure until they run dental records, but the body they found…they think it's Maya." Ashley was certain that she stopped breathing for a moment and she was only brought back to reality when she felt tears roll down her face. She brushed them away and focused back on Toby.

"Where are the girls now?"

"Inside trying to get Emily to talk to them and open her door. Maybe you can try, no one else has been able to get her to say much other than leave me alone followed by more crying." Toby opened the front door and followed Ashley back into the house. Ashley looked to the staircase where Pam was leaning against the banister looking more than a little shocked. Pam turned around when she heard the door open and she looked relieved to see another adult.

"Hanna called me, I hope it's alright that I came over." Pam waved off Ashley's explanation. "Please, I'm sorry I didn't call you, but everything happened so fast and when the girls showed up and then Emily…I should have called you, but I had no clue what to do." Pam seemed to be teetering on the brink of tears, but she was trying to be the one in the house that wasn't falling apart, she had to be the adult in this situation.

"Pam, none of us would know how to handle this, don't stress about calling us, just tell me what I can do." Before Pam could say anything Hanna walked down the staircase and started crying all over again as soon as she was wrapped up in her other's arms. When she had calmed down again Ashley brushed away the tears that clung to her face and waited for Hanna to say something.

"She still won't open the door, Spence is still trying through." Ashley looked to Pam, "mind if I give it a go?"

"Be my guest, just don't be surprised if she shuts you down too." Pam led Hanna into the kitchen where Toby was patiently waiting. Ashley made it up the stairs and when she turned the corner she say Spencer sitting on the floor leaning against the door of Emily's room with Aria standing right behind her looking completely lost.

"Em, please unlock the door, you don't have to deal with this alone." Ashley heard Emily crying through the door and heard her say something back to Spencer. Spencer shook her head and kept talking.

"Emily we aren't going to leave you alone. I can't make this hurt any less, but you don't have to push us away." Spencer got no response that time and she looked to Aria as if to see if she had any ideas about where to go from there. She finally saw Ashley standing there and stood up to greet her best friend's mother. Ashley gave them both a hug because while Maya was Emily's girlfriend, all the girls were found of the young woman who made Emily so happy. "Why don't you guys let me try?"

Spencer looked to Aria with a worried expression. "I don't want her to think we left her."

"She won't, I'll make sure she knows that you guys are just downstairs. Aria started down the stairs and after a moment of hesitation Spencer followed suit. Ashley sat down in the spot that Spencer had just vacated and softly knocked on the door.

"Emily, honey, I sent the girls downstairs to get something to eat, it's just me. Do you think you can open the door for me?"

"Mrs. Marin, no offense, but can you please leave me alone."

"Emily, I would be a pretty bad mother if I left a teenager alone in her room crying. I know you heart is broken and I wish more than anything that I could fix it, but even though I can't do that I can make sure you're safe and support you."

"My girlfriend was killed and was then dumped on my front lawn. I just want to be alone with my grief."

"Well then I'm going to sit out here and wait until you want to open the door."

"It's safer if you just leave. Look at my track record, everyone who I love gets killed and buried in someone's yard."

"Honey this wasn't your fault, loving someone is never a mistake. The girls love you, we all love you and you aren't going to be very successful in pushing us away. Friends are there for you no matter what, through good times and bad."

"How about in murder, what do friends do then?"

"They hold tight to each other and keep each other safe."

"I can't keep them safe unless they stay away from me. I just want some time alone; I want to be allowed to be sad and angry without people looking at me like I'm pitiful."

"Emily no one is telling you that you can't be sad, we just want you to know that it's ok to let people in to help you through this." It got dead quiet for a while, but eventually Emily started talking again.

"I hate this. I'm sick of going to funerals, hell I'm sick of planning funerals. It's like the universe is testing me to see how much I can take before I just give up on happiness."

"Please don't do that."

"Don't do what?"

"Give up on happiness." Ashley rested her head against the cold wood of the door and waited for any response from Emily.

"There's a key underneath the area rug in the hallway." Ashley was stunned by the frank confession, but looked around and saw that the area rug was about three feet from her. She lifted it up and quickly found the key that Emily was talking about. "Emily, I'm going to open the door, is that ok?"

"I wouldn't have told you where the key was if it wasn't ok." Ashley unlocked the door and slowly opened the door. The room was pitch black save for the light coming in from the window. Ashley looked at the bed expecting to find Emily there, but she soon realized that the distraught teenager was lying on her floor still dressed in her ball gown. At first glance she didn't appear to be hurt so Ashley just assumed that she just collapsed on the floor and decided it was as good of a place to mourn as any. Ashley sat down next to Emily and the two stayed in an uncomfortable silence for a while. Ashley was caught a little off guard when the silence got broken, but not by words, but by more crying. Emily went from being practically catatonic to sobbing hard enough that her whole upper body shook as she did. Ashley did what most mothers would have done: she lifted Emily up from the floor and managed to move her so that she was sitting. Emily made eye contact with Ashley for a second and stopped crying for a brief moment.

"She isn't coming back this time." Ashley's heart broke for Emily as she shook her head. "No honey she's not coming back this time. I'm so sorry Emily." Emily returned to crying, but this time she allowed Ashley to hold her close while she did it. After a few minutes Ashley looked up to see Toby standing in the hallway. Without saying anything Toby stepped into the room and lifted Emily out of Ashley lap and gently placed her on the bed. He kissed the top of Emily head before walking out of the room. As Ashley stood up from the floor she could see the girls waiting in the hallway.

"Emily, do you think it would be ok for the girls to stay with you for a while?" Emily didn't say anything, but she nodded her head. Before she left the room Ashley felt Emily grab her hand and squeeze it as if to convey some kind of thank you that the girl just couldn't say out loud. Ashley smiled and kissed her briefly on the crown of her head before she left the room and allowed the girls to enter the room and take care of Emily. She walked downstairs to find Pam and Toby sitting in the kitchen and she sat down at the table with them.

"Thank you for getting her to open the door."

"She finally just told me where the key was, I didn't really do much."

"You did what the rest of us couldn't, don't sell yourself short. I called Veronica and Ella while you were upstairs, they'll be over in a few minutes."

"Did you tell them what happened?" Pam shook her head, "I just told them that something happened and that the girls were all here, but they should probably come check on their daughters." Ashley stood up from the table, "I'll go wait for them outside." Ashley closed the front door behind her and once she was alone she allowed herself to cry. She was trying to be strong and put together for Emily and for the girls, but she would be lying if she said it didn't upset her that another teenager was going to be buried in Rosewood Cemetery. She never knew Maya that well, but she knew how much she meant to Emily and that was enough to make any adult in this situation cry. When she was able to collect herself she looked up to see Ella and Veronica walking up to the house, both wearing worried expressions.

"Are they alright?" Ella cut straight to the question on everyone's mind.

"Physically yes they're all fine."

"If they're ok, then why did one of the officers tell me that the coroner was out here?" Veronica had been let through the tape based on the fact that every cop in Rosewood knew who she was. Ashley took a deep breath and answered, "they won't know for sure until tomorrow morning, but they're pretty sure the body…that its…Maya." Ella and Veronica both looked shell shocked and stood in place absolutely horrified by the gravity of the situation.

"Who found her?" Veronica was the first to say anything.

"Pam did, but the girls showed up as they were loading her body into the van."

"Emily saw them take her away?" Ashley nodded and Ella shook her head trying to make something make sense in this nightmare. "The girls are upstairs with her now." All three of them entered the house and Pam greeted them all with as much good hostess manners as she could manage in the situation. Toby said that he was going to leave and that he would call and check in on them in the morning. As he left they all went upstairs to check on their daughters. The door was still open and the lights were all still off, but it was easy to see that all four of the girls had settled into Emily's bed. Emily was passed out with her head buried into Spencer chest, still clutching at her best friend's dress. Hanna and Aria were on the opposite side of the bed also asleep; it seemed like they had all cried themselves out and the exhaustion took its toll. Their mothers all looked at the four of them fast asleep and while none of them said a word they were all thinking the same thing. How were they going to get their children through this again?


	7. Unquiet Grave

As she stood in line at the café, Ella was positive that the last time she remembered feeling this tired was right after Aria was born. She finally left the Fields home at about 2am, but she found no solace in her own bed at home. The mothers all agreed that they would meet back at the house later in the day after the girls had a chance to wake up. As Ella received her coffee she turned to leave the café, when she ran into Veronica.

"Guess we could all use some caffeine after last night." Veronica forced a smile, "I take it you didn't sleep well either."

"Nope, just kept tossing and turning thinking about Emily and what's happening. Murder doesn't lend itself to deep sleep."

"Same here, but I told Pam I'd meet her at the station so she could give her statement."

"Are the girls in the house alone?"

"Ashley said she would stay and keep an eye on them." Ella nodded, "I'll head over to give her a hand. We'll see you there when you guys finish at the station."

"We shouldn't be more than an hour." With that Veronica disappeared into the coffee shop and Ella got in her car and headed to Emily's house. She pulled up and parked her car behind Ashley's on the street. She knocked on the front door before just walking in to find Ashley loading the dishwasher.

"The girls still asleep? Ashley closed the machine and nodded.

"All of them are still passed out in their ball gowns. I figured I'd help Pam out around the house while I waited for them to wake up." Their brief conversation was cut short when they heard footsteps on the stairs. They looked up to see Spencer and Hanna walking into the kitchen.

"Morning girls." Both girls mumbled good morning back half awake as they sat down at the table.

"Mom can you take me home real quick so I can shower and change out of this dress." Ella turned to Ashley, "I'll stay with the rest of them."

"Spencer, why don't you come with us? We can swing by your house so you can change too." Spencer agreed and followed Hanna out of the house and into her mom's car. Ashley grabbed her coat and told Ella that they would be back soon. Once the house was fallen silent again, Ella settled into one of the kitchen chairs and was focused on her coffee until a voice startled her.

"Would have thought that you left with the others." Emily was standing in the doorway still in her dress and looking like she had just stopped crying.

"I wouldn't be a very good mother if I left you and Aria alone." Ella smiled trying to break the tension.

"Sometimes being alone is what people need." Emily pointed out as she sat down at the table.

"Not when a murderer is on the loose." Emily looked like she had been punched in the stomach when she heard the word murderer. Ella reached out and took Emily's hand in an effort to offer support. "Emily, I'm so sorry."

"Thank you." Emily lowered her head slightly as she uttered the thank you. She tried to keep the tears at bay for as long as she could. "Where's my mom?"

"At the station, giving her statement." Emily nodded her head as she stood up. "I think I'm going to shower before she gets back."

"Can I make you something to eat? Ella was at a loss as to how to be helpful.

"No thank you, I'm not really hungry."

"Is there anything I can do Emily?" Emily shook her head, "I'm not hungry, I'm exhausted and my entire body hurts. I have a feeling that I'm just going to have to wait it out."

"I can take Aria home, give you some space, if that's what you need."

"I don't know what I want anymore. Later, when they call and confirm what I already know to be true, that she really is dead, then I will probably want to be alone, but for now its nice to have them here." Ella nodded and tried to offer Emily a reassuring smile.

"I think I'm going to go take that shower now and get out of this dress. I'm sure I look terrible."

"No, you look tired and sad."

"Understatement of the year." Emily felt bad for being so short, but she had no energy left to pretend to be ok.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Montgomery, you're just trying to help and I'm acting like an ungrateful child." Ella shook her head. "Emily, you are going though something traumatic and painful. No one expects you to be your usual happy self."

"Still…thanks for trying to help." Emily started to leave the room when Ella's voice stopped her. "Emily, it's ok not to be ok right now. You don't have to be brave or strong for anyone." Emily slowly tuned around so that she was facing her teacher and the tears she had tried to keep at bay were now flowing freely down her face.

"I loved her." Emily took a quick gulp of air. "I loved her and someone killed her. She died alone and scared while I was at a fucking party. I should have gone with her when she asked me to. I was supposed to protect her. If I had been with her, I could have saved her, its all my fault."

"Emily none of what happened was your fault and if you had been with her, you both could have gotten killed and we would be mourning your loss too." Ella took a few steps toward the hysterical teenager, knowing that offering perspective wasn't going to help much.

"Maybe it should have been me. I should've been with her, I should have died with her." Emily spoke with an eerie calmness to her voice and Ella was frightened by it enough to grab her by the shoulders and hug her close to her own body.

"Don't ever say that Emily. I know you loved her, I know your hurting, but never say that you were meant to die with her." Emily struggled against Ella with no success and she finally stopped fighting and let all her weight go limp. Ella gently settled them both on the kitchen floor while never letting go of the sobbing teenager.

"Why does this hurt so fucking much?"

"I'm so sorry Emily." Ella had no real words of wisdom and she certainly didn't have an answer so 'I'm sorry' was the only thing she could offer. They both remained quiet for a few minutes and eventually Emily sat up and tried to brush away the tears from her eyes.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to freak out like that."

"You don't have to apologize for crying. Crying is healthy. I'd rather you cry than hold it in." Emily stood up from the floor and Ella followed suit. Emily was about to walk out of the room when Ella stopped her.

"Emily did you mean it?"

"Did I mean what?"

"That you think you should be dead?"

"I didn't mean it the way you think I meant it."

"And how's that?"

"I'm not suicidal."

"Emily, I'd really like to believe that, but you do understand why I'm concerned."

"I'm not going to kill myself, I wouldn't do that to my parents, or the girls or any of you. I'm just depressed."

"Maybe you should think about talking to a therapist."

"I'll talk to my mom about finding one. Can I go take that shower now?" Emily was desperate to have this conversation end and she really just wanted to take a hot shower. Ella smiled, "of course you can." Emily turned to leave the room but paused one more time.

"I promise you Mrs. Montgomery, you will never have to attend my funeral. I'm sad and heartbroken and I would give anything on this earth to have just five more minutes with Maya. But the one thing I won't give is my life. I almost lost myself when Ali died, I won't do it again." With that the teenager walked away leaving her best friend's mother in a slight state of shock. As soon as Ella heard the water turn on in the upstairs bathroom she also heard the front door open. Hanna and Spencer both walked in with bags in their hands and wet hair that hung loosely at their shoulders. They went upstairs with their bags and Ashley walked back into the kitchen hold her own cup of coffee.

"Anything happen while we were gone?"

"A lot happened while you were gone."

"What is it, have you been crying?" Ashley got a closer look at Ella's face and was instantly curious as to what had happened in the last half an hour. Ella explained what had happened with Emily while the other girls had been out of the house and when she was done Ashley looked just as concerned as she had been when it happened.

"You think she's ok?"

"I'd still feel better if someone evaluated her for suicide risk, but I think at this stage in her grief it's just her trying to deal with the loss and the guilt she feels. I don't think she's a danger to herself, she just needs time." The two mothers sat there I silence trying to collect their thoughts and their silence was only interrupted when all the girls minus Emily came walking into the kitchen.

"My mom just texted me, she said they were finishing up and would be home soon." Spencer stared at her phone and took a deep breath before continuing, "she also said the coroner's report just got released, she has a copy of it." Spencer looked up from her phone to meet Aria's gaze and her face answered the question that everyone had in their minds.

Hanna jumped in and asked, "do we tell Emily?" The water had stopped and they could all hear Emily moving around in her room. Emily started singing something softly, but with the house as quiet as it was, everyone could hear her as she sang.

**How pleasant is the wind tonight**

**I feel some drops of rain**

**I never had but one true love**

**In greenwood he lies slain**

**I'll do so much for my true love**

**As any young girl may**

**I'll sit and mourn all on your grave**

**For twelve months and a day**

**The twelve months and a day being up**

**The ghost began to speak**

**Why sit you here and mourn for me**

**And you will not let me sleep**

**What do you want of me sweetheart**

**Oh what is it you crave**

**Just one kiss of your lily white lips**

**And that is all I crave**

**Oh don't you see the fire sweetheart**

**The fire that burns so blue**

**Where my poor soul tormented is**

**All for the love of you**

**And if you weren't my own sweetheart**

**As I know you well to be**

**I'd rend you up in pieces small**

**As leaves upon a tree**

**Mourn not for me my dearest dear**

**Mourn not for me I crave**

**I must leave you and all the world**

**And turn into my grave**

Spencer shook her head and brushed some stray tears from her eyes with the back of her hand. She turned to Hanna and in an uncharacteristically shaky voice she responded, "there is nothing in that report that we can tell her that she doesn't already know to be true. She knows she's gone, what good would it do her to show her proof of her own personal hell."

Ashley and Ella were about to stand up to go check on Emily when Spencer reached out and grabbed Ashley's hand.

"Please don't panic, that song doesn't mean what you think it means. A man's lover dies, and he is devastated. He vows to sit by her grave and mourn her for a year and a day. After this time has passed, his dead lover appears to him. He wants to be with her again, but she tells him he must move on with his life or it will not be long before he is in the ground with her. She isn't going to hurt herself, she just found a song that kind of perfectly describes the situation."

The two mothers shared a relieved glance and sat back down. All any of them could do now was wait for everyone to return to the house so that they could move onto the next stage of this process, although none of them knew what that meant or how to even begin.

**The song is Unquiet Grave by Kate Rusby.**


	8. Absolute Peace

**As a psychology graduate student I was glad they finally addressed one of the girls having PTSD because really they should all have it after the stuff they have gone through. But poor Paige :-( Anyway, here's the next chapter, hope you enjoy it. Go 49ers!**

It had been a week since the official report had been released and the funeral was set for that Saturday morning. Emily had spent the first few days held up in her room, only talking to the girls, their mothers or her own mother. That Friday she had forced herself to go to school for the sake of putting an end to the rumors that she too was dead. That day was hard on everyone, but Emily was certain she wasn't going to survive it. From the time she stepped out of her car she got people looking at her funny: their faces showing a mix of pity and empathy for her loss. She soldiered through her first class by simply avoiding eye contact with everyone, not talking and relying on the girls who provided a barrier between her and other people. People offered condolences and Emily would smile diplomatically and thank them, all the while trying hard not to start crying.

Second period found Spencer and Emily in AP Lit, which made them breathe a little easier knowing that Ella taught that class. Emily walked in behind Spencer and as she passed by Ella's desk the older woman offered her a cautious smile as if to ask how she was doing. Emily nodded her head and returned the tentative smile before taking her seat behind Spencer. The bell rang and Ella focused the class and explained what they would be doing that day. She had put a collection of literary quotes into a jar and each of them would pull one out, read it and offer some interpretation of it to facilitate a class discussion. The first few students went and after Spencer finished her passage from Dante's Inferno it was Emily's turn. She reached into the jar and pulled out her random quote, carefully reading it. As Emily read the quote Spencer happened to glance back at her friend and realized at that moment the color had literally gone out of Emily's face.

"Emily? Can you read the quote out loud for us?" Ella prompted her, not knowing what was going on. Spencer reached back and grabbed the paper from Emily and just by reading the first sentence she knew why Emily just couldn't bring herself to read it.

"Mrs. Montgomery, can I read it for her?" Spencer tried to spare Emily, but Ella didn't understand why and pushed for Emily to do it herself.

"It's fine Spence." She took the paper back from her friend, cleared her throat and in a shaky voice read.

"They say that in the second before our death, each of us understands the real reason for our existence, and out of that moment, Heaven or Hell is born. Hell is when we look back during that fraction of a second and know that we wasted an opportunity to dignify the miracle of life. Paradise is being able to say at that moment: "I made some mistakes, but I wasn`t a coward. I lived my life and did what I had to do. -Paulo Coelho" Ella felt an insane amount of guilt for not trusting Spencer when she pleaded for Emily not to do that quote.

"Emily, you don't have to…" Ella tried to spare her from actually trying to explore the meaning behind the quote, but Emily cut her off.

"I think he makes death sound simple, if anything over simplistic. People spend their entire lives trying to avoid Hell and earn their spot in Heaven and that competition with ourselves usually causes stress and forces us to screw up, forces us to make mistakes, hurt people we love, be cowards. I mean his definition of hell is something we've all done. We have all looked back at something we did or didn't do when we realize we wasted a chance to live. But if we don't realize that until the moment we are dying, we don't get a chance to fix it and that is what makes it hell: no do-overs, no restart button, no second chance, just darkness. I can't think of anything more hellish than that." Emily looked at her hands and took a deep breath before continuing.

"But heaven, paradise is all about looking back on your life and admitting that you were human. You screwed up, made mistakes, but you didn't let those mistakes make you afraid to live the rest of your life. You got back on the horse and tried again because it doesn't matter how many times they knock you down, it's how fast you get up. You don't let the fear of messing up, the fear of death keep you from living. And if you do that, you can look back in that moment and know that you did what you were put on this earth to do. Kind of a comforting thought: no matter how old you are, you could achieve that paradise. So even someone my age could be looking death in the face and see something greater waiting for them because they lived. Almost makes death seem inviting." Emily spoke the last thing she said so softly that only Spencer heard it. She turned around to see Emily trying to put on a brave face but there were tears rolling down her face. Spencer turned back around to meet Ella's concerned stare.

"Thank you for that Emily, that was a beautiful interpretation." Spencer was never so thankful to hear the bell ring. The shrill noise caused everyone to stand up and gather up their belongings. Spencer was going to try to make Emily stay put and wait for the others to leave first, but the second the class was over Emily stood up and practically ran out of the room. Spencer shook her head and picked up Emily bag along with her own.

"Spencer." Ella was now standing behind the teenager and was worried about where Emily had gone. "I'm sorry I didn't even remember I had that quote in there and when you asked to do it for her I just thought she would get tired of people treating her like a glass egg."

"It's not your fault, she was going to do it no matter what we did. I should go find her."

"I'll come with you."

"As you wish, but she isn't going to be in a good place when we find her. I really should just take her home, tomorrow is going to be hard enough." Spencer made her way into the hallway with Ella hot on her heals, but Spencer seemed to have a good idea where she was going. As the bell rang for third period rang Spencer got to the doors of the pool and pushed it open and held it open for Ella to follow her. Spencer put the bags she was holding down on the bench and stood back from the edge of the pool.

"Where is she?" Ella was confused because as she looked around and saw no sign of Emily. Spencer pointed to the high dive board and when Ella looked up Emily could be seen lying flat against the diving board starring at the ceiling.

"What is she doing up there?"

"My guess, trying to escape everything down here and gain a little perspective."

"Do we go get her?"

"Absolutely not, I'm just as worried about her as you are, but she has been the focus of attention all damn week and today made it worse, right now she needs a minute alone." Besides there is only one easy way down form there, so we just wait." The two of them sat on the bench for a few minutes before Spencer saw Emily push herself up from the board so that she was standing. Emily took off her shirt and her jeans so that she was standing there in her bra and underwear. Spencer and Ella watched her shift her weight back and forth, contemplating when to time her jump.

"Does she even know how to dive?"

"She did diving first, when we were younger, but she didn't like it as much as lap swimming. Besides relays are more competitive and Emily always does better with someone swimming next to her, forcing her to do better." Just as Spencer said that she saw Emily measure her steps to the tip of the board before returning to the base and running into the dive. She bounced off the board and spun around twice in the air before entering the water without much of a splash at all.

"She's very good."

"Emily always belonged in the water." Spencer laughed a little before she looked back at the pool expecting to see Emily's head come up for air. Her smile faded and she quickly threw off her shoes and started to take off her own clothes.

"What are you doing, what's going on?"

"She used to do this when we were kids. She stays down there until she practically passes out."

"Why?"

"There's no sounds, its absolute peace." Spencer took out her earrings, handed them to Ella and took a running start toward the water and dove into the area of water Emily should have ended up in. Ella held the jewelry in her hand and watched Spencer disappear into the water and said to herself, "like dying." A few second later Spencer surfaced and a split second later so did Emily. Spencer turned and swam to the edge of the water and pushed her self out of the water before turning around and offering Emily her hand. She pulled Emily out of the water and Ella handed them both towels. Spencer wrapped herself up in the towel before speaking.

"Don't you think we're getting a little to old for you to be doing that?"

"It's peaceful and I would have come up eventually, I mean I do have to breathe."

"Just as long as you remember that."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You know full well what that means. I heard that little musing that you thought you whispered in class. I can't imagine the hell you're in, losing another person you loved like that, but what I can promise you is that I will NOT stand by and watch you slowly kill yourself because while it is hopelessly unfair that you have to bury another girlfriend I refuse to bury another best friend, especially you. I'm not losing you to her." Emily felt a pang of guilt in her heart, she wasn't trying to hurt herself, but she knew that somewhere in her heart Spencer was right about her behavior.

"This really sucks." That was all Emily could say back and it was the honest to God truth. Spencer wrapped her towel around Emily while the two embraced. "I know it does, but you don't have to shoulder this pain alone, that's what friends are for and I'm not going anywhere." Emily remained quiet so Spencer handed her the bag she left in the classroom.

"Go change, I'm taking you home." Emily was going to protest, but she knew that she needed to go home and Spencer wasn't about to take no for an answer so she grabbed her bag and turned into the locker room. Ella handed Spencer her clothes and the teenager got dressed before turning back to her teacher.

"Her mom and Mrs. Marin are still at her house, we aren't going into an empty house."

"That's not what I was going to ask about, but I'm glad that someone is at the house." Ella tried to choose her words carefully. "Do you think she was trying to…."

"No. Look I'll admit this doesn't look good and if you took her to a shrink right now I can promise you they would diagnose her with Depression, but she doesn't want to die. she just wants some peace and no offence, but lately it seems like the only people in this town that get peace are the ones we bury. She just needed a moment of real peace and she got it, but I wasn't going to leave her down there any long than that."

"You're a good friend Spencer."

"Yeah, well, so is she." At that moment Emily came out of the locker room dressed and Spencer grabbed her bag. "Can you spin a good story to the front office as to why we left?"

"I'm sure I can come up with something, or I could just tell them the truth." Spencer smiled and walked over and linked arms with Emily. The two of them walked out into the parking lot behind the gym, leaving Ella alone to hope that spending some time with Spencer would be enough to carry Emily through the funeral set for the next morning.

**So next I'll do the funeral then move onto to other things because this is depressing. Either way, let me know your thoughts and I'll see what I can do in later chapters. Thanks for reading folks.**


	9. A Miracle

On their way back to Emily's house Spencer tried in vain to get a hold of Pam. Her calls to the house went unanswered and when Emily tried calling her mother's cell phone, she again received no answer. Thinking quick on her feet, Spencer hit the button on her phone that would ring through to Hanna's house phone.

"Marin residence."

"Mrs. Marin, its Spencer. I can't get ahold of Mrs. Fields and I have Emily in the car with me and Pam doesn't appear to be home, is there anyway we can come over to your house?"

"Shouldn't you both still be in class? Did something happen? Is she ok?" Spencer glanced at Emily sitting next to her and she seemed sad, but in better shape then she was when they left class.

"Um, yeah Aria's mom sent her home and told me to go with her."

"Pam had to run an errand and I headed home to take care of a few things. I'll unlock the front door for you."

"Thanks Mrs. Marin." Spencer hung up her phone and caught Emily looking out the window.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

"I hate this town." Spencer was expecting Emily to say a lot of things, but that wasn't one of them.

"Care to elaborate?"

"This town is toxic, nothing good ever happens here Spencer, at least not to us. We lost Ali, then they found her body and we lost her again and as much as she hurts us, losing her forever hurt. Then we try to pick up and move on and even single time we stand up A knocks us back down. We fall in love and then it happens all over again. Nothing good ever comes out of this town." Spencer happened to pull up in front of the Marin house right as Emily was done talking, but just as Emily reached for the door Spencer locked the car.

"You can't mean that Em."

"Mean what, that I hate this town?"

"No, I'm with you on that, this town is awful, but you said that nothing good ever comes out of this town."

"It doesn't."

"You were born here weren't you? YOU came out of this town Emily." Spencer reached up and removed something from the sun visor above her head. She handed Emily a piece of paper, a picture, one of the four of them from a few months prior. "This may have hurt us more than I thought we could handle, but it gave us all one thing: each other. So yes, this town sucks and bad things follow us everywhere, but in spite of everything something good came from all this hurt. And even if you can't believe that, then believe me when I say that in spite of everything this town has stolen from us, the best thing this town has to offer is sitting in my passenger seat questioning her self worth. I love you, we all love you and I'll be damned if you spend even one second thinking that you aren't something good that this town produced." Spencer got out of the car and slammed the door behind her, leaving Emily stunned in her seat. Emily was a little surprised when Spencer open the passenger door and stood there waiting for Emily to get out. After a moment of silence Spencer held out her hand for Emily to take.

"When we graduate, if you want to get out of this town, I will personally drive you to wherever it is you want to start your new life, but right now I just need you to keep in this fight because I can't do this without you." Emily looked at Spencer for a moment before asking, "wherever I want to go?"

"Wherever." Emily unbuckled her seatbelt and took hold of Spencer's outstretched hand, allowing her friend to pull her out of the car. The two of them walked to the front door of Hanna's house and before Spencer opened it Emily stopped her, "maybe I was wrong, this town brought us together and it may be the only good thing it ever did for me." Spencer offered Emily a sad smile, knowing that she wasn't going to convince Emily that things were going to get better, not today anyway. They entered the house and before Spencer shut the door Ashley Marin came in from the kitchen to greet them.

"Everything ok?"

"Yeah I just had a hard day, probably shouldn't have gone." Ashley rubbed Emily's shoulder in a desperate effort to soothe her. "Is there something I can do to help?"

"I think I just want to go shower if that's ok?"

"Of course it is. I think you left some shampoo here last time you all stayed over and you can help yourself to the towels." Without saying much of anything Emily headed upstairs, leaving Spencer in the living room with Ashley.

"So you want to tell me why you were both dripping wet?"

"Emily went swimming to clear her head."

"That only explains why she was wet, why are you wet?

"She stayed under for a little too long for my liking so I went in and got her out." Spencer tried to shrug it off as no big thing, but Ashley wasn't buying it and her face must have given her away because Spencer tried to justify what happened.

"She wasn't trying to kill herself and if we keep acting like she is going to we are only going to put the idea in her head. Look Mrs. Marin, let me be honest, if someone killed my first love then a year later someone else killed my lover I would be a little depressed too. Is she depressed, yes? In her head does she want to die, probably? But honestly she just wants to be with her again, she doesn't really want death, she just wants her and I get that. If you guys as adults really want to have her evaluated then fine, I'm just a teenager I have to legal way to stop that, but dragging her through Radley isn't going to make anything better and it will push her over the edge, that I can promise you."

Ashley held up her hands in defense, "Spencer, take a breath and calm down, I'm not going to do anything like that, Pam was thinking about seeing if Emily would maybe go see that doctor you all saw a few months back, just to give her a third party person to help her out. No one is taking her to Radley." Spencer relaxed a little bit and tried to shake off the anger in her voice.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have yelled at you, you're just trying to help her. I just…she keeps getting dealt the shitty hand and I'm kind of over it."

"You care about her, we all do Spencer and we'll find a way to get her through this, but you have to trust us a little bit." Spencer nodded and went to go use the other bathroom so that she could get the pool water out of her hair and put on some dry clothes. Ashley went into the kitchen and finally managed to get a hold of Pam who said she would be a few more hours, but that if it was ok with Ashley, that Emily could stay the night there. Of course Ashley said it was fine, but she asked what Pam was doing and why she wouldn't be home until later. Pam just said that she was trying to do something to help Emily and left it at that. Ashley hung up with Pam right about the time that Emily came downstairs wearing some PJ pants and a long sleeve shirt that was too big for her.

"Did you guys get a chance to eat?"

"Yeah we ate lunch at school." Emily tried to make small talk, but she didn't really want to, nor did she have the energy.

"Emily you don't have to make conversations with me if you don't want to."

"It's just been a really long day, guess I'm kind of tired." Emily took a few steps toward the staircase, I think I'm going to go lay down in Hanna's room if that's ok."

"Of course it is." Emily disappeared up the stairs and Spencer eventually emerged from the downstairs bathroom dressed in her own leisurewear and with her wet hair wrapped in a towel.

"Is Emily still in the shower?"

"She's upstairs in Hanna's room, she said she was tired." Spencer heard some music playing from upstairs and she assumed that Emily had plugged in her iPod. She was about to go upstairs when she heard the music and realized that she knew that song. It was beautiful, poetic and tragic; in short it fit the situation perfectly. She walked up the steps and stood in the hallway listening to the lyrics while she watched Emily curl up on Hanna's bed.

**Love of mine some day you will die**

**But I'll be close behind**

**I'll follow you into the dark**

**No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white**

**Just our hands clasped so tight**

**Waiting for the hint of a spark**

**If Heaven and Hell decide**

**That they both are satisfied**

**Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs**

**If there's no one beside you**

**When your soul embarks**

**Then I'll follow you into the dark**

Ashley eventually came upstairs and stood behind Spencer, neither one of them totally sure what to do.

**In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule**

**I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black**

**And I held my tongue as she told me**

**"Son fear is the heart of love"**

**So I never went back**

**If Heaven and Hell decide**

**That they both are satisfied**

**Illuminate the NOs on their vacancy signs**

**If there's no one beside you**

**When your soul embarks**

**Then I'll follow you into the dark**

Spencer slowly pushed the door more open and without saying a word she climbed into bed and wrapped her arms around Emily. Emily didn't protest the contact and instead turned toward Spencer so that her head was resting against Spencer's chest.

**You and me have seen everything to see**

**From Bangkok to Calgary**

**And the soles of your shoes are all worn down**

**The time for sleep is now**

**It's nothing to cry about**

**'cause we'll hold each other soon**

**In the blackest of rooms**

**If Heaven and Hell decide**

**That they both are satisfied**

**Illuminate the No's on their vacancy signs**

**If there's no one beside you**

**When your soul embarks**

**Then I'll follow you into the dark**

**Then I'll follow you into the dark**

Ashley shut the door before she walked back downstairs, hoping that Emily would get some rest and that Spencer would be able to provide some comfort to her in the mean time. About an hour later the phone rang again, but this time it was someone who Ashley had never actually met before: Maya's mother. The woman sounded tired and it was evident that she was trying hard no to cry. She called to ask if Emily would like to come with them to the visitation at the funeral home that night. Ashley asked if Emily was aware that it was happening and Maya's mother told her that she had been talking to her about it over the last few days but that Emily never gave a straight answer. Ashley said she would go ask Emily and have Emily call back with her answer. After hanging up with Maya's mother Ashley went back upstairs and carefully opened the door to see Spencer running her fingers through Emily hair. She wasn't sure if Emily was asleep or if she was just resting. Spencer looked up when she heard the door open and she gentle tapped Emily on the shoulder, which caused her eyes to open and quickly scan the room.

"Emily, I'm sorry to wake you, but Maya's mother called asking if you were going to the visitation with them tonight?" Emily sighed and shook her head like she had forgotten all about it.

"I'll go call her back." Emily grabbed her cell phone and she was about to go downstairs when she turned back to Spencer. "If I go will you go with me?"

"Whatever you need." Emily nodded and left the room to make her phone call. Spencer took her hair out of the ponytail she had it in and went into the bathroom to turn on Hanna's flatiron. When Emily came back she said that they would need to leave in about an hour to meet the family at the funeral home. After that, both the girls got ready in silence and when the hour was up Emily made her way downstairs and without saying anything she climbed into Spencer's car and waited for Spencer to join her. Spencer met Ashley in the living room before she walked outside, "we'll be back in a while and I'll try to update you when I can." Spencer left the house and within second her car disappeared from the Marin's driveway.

About two hours later Ashley heard the front door open and heard Hanna shout out that she was home. Ashley looked up to see that her daughter wasn't alone; Aria and Ella followed her into the kitchen.

"Where are Spence and Emily? My mom said they came home early." Ella and Ashley shared a look and Ashley turned back to the girls. "Emily was having a hard day and Pam is handling something so they came here."

"So where are they now, I didn't see Spencer's car in the driveway and Emily car is still at school?"

"Spencer went with Emily to the visitation memorial service. They actually should be back soon." Almost immediately after she said that they heard another car pull up outside and they heard Spencer's voice. The front door swung open and they all saw Emily run in and quickly sprint up the stairs. Spencer entered the house a tried going after Emily with minimal success.

"Emily. Damn it, Emily I can't run in heels." By the time Spencer was half way up the staircase she heard the door slam and she knew that Emily was already in Hanna's room and that running after her would do precious little. She tore the shoes off her feet and threw them at the bottom of the stairs out of frustration and she then took a seat on the bottom of the staircase, holding her head in her hands and sighing heavily. Aria was the only one to move form her spot in the kitchen to go see what had just happened. She sat down next to Spencer and they had a conversation that was very quick and very quiet and it resulted in Spencer crying and throwing her arms around the shorter girl. When she had calmed down a little bit Aria pulled Spencer to her feet and they went into the kitchen. No one had the courage to ask what was wrong, or what had happened, but Spencer took a deep breath and glanced around the room.

"It was a very nice memorial service and everyone was lovely to her, but they failed to mention something to her." Spencer almost started to cry again and Aria rubbed her back trying to soothe her friend and encourage her to continue. "They failed to mention that it was an open casket service." It felt like all the air had been sucked out of the room when Spencer said it and they all stood there shocked by what they had heard.

"So Emily saw her?" Ella stated the painfully obvious.

"We all saw her. Emily was with Maya parents for a while and they weren't in the room right away and I was told I could go in and sit down since it would be a while before family showed up. I took two steps inside and saw the lid up and I tried to turn around and stop Emily from coming in, but they were being led in through another door and before I could stop her she was already standing at the casket. Her parents had a moment and then told Emily to take her time and that they would start when she was ready. She just stood there, starring at her body, like she could will her back to life and I swear I could feel her heart break all over again. I don't know where she found the strength to do it, but she kissed her hand and pressed it to her cheek and then took some thing out of her purse put it in the casket and turned back to me saying she was ready. She cried during the service, but she held it together almost a little bit too well. Once we were done everyone offered their condolences to her and Maya folks and we thanked them and left. The second we got in the car she lost every ounce of composure and just started crying hysterically, like it all hit her at once. I had to pull over three times on our way back because she had to throw up." Spencer let her head fall back into her hands and no one really knew what to say. Aria and Hanna both wrapped their arms around her in a hug and tried to at least offer their support while their mothers looked at each other trying to find the right thing to say to help. They heard more music coming from upstairs and once again the girls, or at Spencer recognized the song. They went and stood at the base of the staircase and all three of them sat down. They wanted to support Emily, but give her a little bit of space to work through this new hellish development. The music got louder, like Emily was trying to drown out the pain and now the whole house could hear the music.

**You look so beautiful today**

**When you're sitting there it's hard for me to look away**

**So i try to find the words that i could say**

**I know distance doesn't matter but you feel so far away**

**And I can't lie**

**Every time I leave my heart turns gray**

**And I wanna come back home to see your face tonight**

**Cause I just can't take it**

**Another day without you with me**

**Is like a blade that cuts right through me**

**But I can wait**

**I can wait forever**

**When you call my heart stops beating**

**When you're gone it won't stop bleeding**

**But I can wait**

**I can wait forever**

**You look so beautiful today**

**It's like every time I turn around I see your face**

**The thing I miss the most is waking up next to you**

**When I look into your eyes**

**Man, I wish that I could stay and I can't lie**

**Every time I leave my heart turns gray**

**And I wanna come back home to see your face tonight**

**And I**

**Cause I just can't take it**

Spencer sang some of the words under her breath and shook her head, desperately try to make sense of what was going on, but she just couldn't.

**Another day without you with me**

**Is like a blade that cuts right through me**

**But I can wait**

**I can wait forever**

**When you call my heart stops beating**

**When you're gone it won't stop bleeding**

**But I can wait**

**I can wait forever**

**I know it feels like forever**

**I guess that's just the price I gotta pay**

**But when I come back home to feel your touch**

**Makes it better**

**Until that day**

**There's nothing else that I can do**

**And I just can't take it**

**I just can't take it**

**Another day without you with me**

**Is like a blade that cuts right through me**

**But i can wait**

**I can wait forever (I can wait forever)**

**When you call my heart stops beating**

**When you're gone it won't stop bleeding**

**But I can wait**

**I can wait forever**

**I can wait forever**

**I can wait forever...**

By that point both Ella and Ashley were standing in the doorway watching this scene unfold.

"It's going to take a miracle to get her out of that room for the funeral or at all." Ella shook her head mostly because she knew that Ashley was right, they really did need a miracle. At that moment the front door opened and Pam Fields tentatively stepped inside. She made eye contact with Hanna who pointed in the direction of the kitchen and Pam looked up to see Ella and Ashley waiting.

"I'm sorry I wasn't home. What happened?"

"Emily went to the memorial service with Spencer and they failed to mention to either of them that it was an open casket ceremony." Pam looked like someone had punched her in the stomach and all the color left her face.

"Let me guess, now she's in Hanna's room, won't come out, playing loud music."

"We haven't tried to get her out yet, we thought it best to give her a minute before we tried to get out. Might take a miracle to get her out of Hanna's room for the funeral though." Ashley added.

"Well it just so happens I brought a miracle with me." Pam left the kitchen and Ella and Ashley both looked confused, but followed her anyway. Pam kept her hand on the door knob and turned back to them and at this point the girls were paying attention to what was going on.

"While this wasn't my original plan, if a miracle is what it'll take then we just got extremely luck because there is only one person that can get her to open that door." Pam opened the door and as she did both Ella and Ashley let go of the breath they had been holding and a look of relief washed over both mothers' faces. Standing in the doorway of the Marin house was Wayne Fields still dressed in his uniform. The girls saw Emily's dad standing in the doorway and immediately stood up from their seats on the stairs. Wayne looked at the girls' worried expressions and turned to their mothers.

"It's worse than what Pam told me in the car, isn't it?" Spencer stepped forward so that she was standing in front of Wayne. "The memorial service was open casket and she didn't know that when we went. Mr. Fields, I'm so sorry I tried to stop Emily from seeing her like that, but I couldn't…" Spencer was getting worked up again and it was then that people realized that Spencer saw exactly what Emily did and while Spencer wasn't dating Maya, they were friends and this was hurting her too. Wayne closed the distance between himself and the teenager and gave his daughter's best friend a hug.

"It's ok Spencer, this isn't your fault ok. You were there for Emily when she needed someone and I'll always be thankful to you for that. I'm just sorry that you both had to see Maya like that; that couldn't have been easy for either of you." Spencer pulled away from Wayne and offered him a sad smile and rejoined the girls who were now standing next to the their mothers. Pam tried calling upstairs for Emily to come down, that they were going home, but she got no response.

"Emily come on we need to go home, we have an early day tomorrow with the funeral." That got her a response in the form of Emily yelling downstairs.

"I'm not going to the funeral, just leave me the hell alone." Pam was about to walk upstairs but her husband held his hand out to stop her. Then in his most authoritative military voice he called after his daughter, "Emily Elizabeth Fields, you mind your mother and get down here right now." In about 10 seconds they head Hanna's door fly open and fast footsteps stopped when Emily reached the top of the staircase. She looked down at her father standing there and she was sure she was seeing things.

"Daddy?"

"Hi Emmy." That was all he had to say and Emily was flying down the stairs and when she reached the bottom step she practically jumped into her father's arms. Tears started all over again and not just Emily's, everyone had tears in their eyes watching the reunion. When Emily calmed down a little bit Wayne kissed the top of her head.

"Why don't you go grab your things and we'll go home?"

"You're staying?"

"I only have three days here, then I have to go back, but I will be here for the funeral." It wasn't the most ideal situation, but three days of emergency leave was better than not having her father there at all so Emily took it for what it was: a gift at a time when she desperately needed one.


End file.
